Listening skills are unusual. One grow up communicating very differently from the other one, depending on ample of factors, gender being just one of them.From somewhere each of us have heard these words – ” He plan night outs with his ‘guys’ instead with me.” , “instead to talk with me she spent hours on phone with her ‘girlfriends’.” , ” he don’t come for shopping with me instead spent time in playing video games.” and so on.
It’s very important to understand each other, what your partner trying to say, what he/she actually expect to listen. Both should learn different ways of communicating with each other. It’s not like that your partner isn’t listening to you, it’s simply that you are hardly trying to communicate with each other in ill-assorted manner.
But both of them have different values regarding relationships,as well as enormously special ways of dealing with anxiety and emotional issues. The problems generally arises after a long relationship.Men have a propensity to hold their emotions in, letting them rumble, and then sometimes burst out in pain or anger. Females in comparison to males can more easily, and freely express their emotions, but males find some difficulty to express what exactly they feel.
Conversely, the variations men and women have communicating are often buffed over in the commencement of a relationship, even during the first few months. But over time, they become more and more noticeable.
It would be undignified and ultimately pointless of me to repeat the same thing again and again, so often heard about what each sex values in a relationship, since people’s personal preferences fluctuate far and wide.The key to be in a happy relationship is learning to communicate open and freely with your momentous other in a relationship.
Some helpful tips are :
1. Express – what you feel, just learn to express it.
2. Listen – what he/she says don’t just hear but listen to your partner and give them your response. Instead of debating one needs to learn to respect that basic truth
“Rahul , I am very hurt right now.. whatever you said was so mean.”
instead of above one should say – ” Rahul, I am very hurt right now, your words were so painful for me to hear”
3. Understand that there is no looser in argument, life is not a game and you don’t get a second chance.Arguments feel better when they are a depict and you both come away from it understanding the other’s situation and feelings more fully, with your esteem in one piece.
4.Place yourself in the other person’s shoes and try to see their perception. This is exceptionally difficult for some people to do, because they cannot get away from their own thoughts, even for a second. But by learning to do so, one can get an enhanced sense of where that person is coming from and what may be rousing them to say or experience certain things.
All the above tricks are the magic blocks which create a strong wall of love and security in a relationship.